Jokes for Topic: Money (पैसे)

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Topic: Money (पैसे)
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Ques : shadi me dulhe ke saath
Baarati kyun jate hain ? ? ?
Ans :- kyunki bade kehte hain ki kisiki khushi mein
Jao na jao par musibat me zarur jana chahiye..
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Pathan raat ko Machardani laga kar
so raha tha:

Achanak ek Jugnoo aa nikla.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Pathan: Lo ye khocha machar humko
Torch le kar dondh raha hai.

Grlfrnd - mera dil mobile hai or tum SIM ho
Boyfrnd - O very good I am very happy!
Girlfrnd - zyada khush mat ho naya offer milte hi me SIM change kar deti hu.

1980
Enginr sahb ka ghr konsa h?
wo jo bada bngla h,wo'
2010 'xcuse me,
yha engineer ka ghr konsa h?
'abey kisi b ghr me ghus ja. ek na 1 to hoga

Wife:Samne wale ghar me Miya Biwi k bich kuch fight chal rhi he. Aap 1bar jaiye na


Husbnd:Me 1 do bar gya tha.Shayad ye usi ka natija hai! ;)
Beta : 500 Rs Do na.

Papa : Kya Karega ?

Beta : Mere Sare Friends Ka A/C Hai,
Mai Bhi Khulwaunga.

Papa : Very Good. Kaha Pe ?

Beta : Cigrate Ki Dukan Par.
Husband-kya hua itni pareshan kyu ho?
Wife-munne ne 1 rupya nigal liya hai,
hus-nigalne do aaj kal 1rs ka aata hi kya hai,

Air Hostess to Raaz in plane-Raaz Sahab Aap Kya Lenge?

Raaz-Mai Neeche Uter kar Rickshaw Loonga
GOLU ne naya Saloon khola.

1 Aadmi Shave karane aaya.

GOLU-Muchhe rakhni hai?

Man-Ha.

GOLU Muchchhe kaat ke-Lo ji rakh lo jaha rakhni hai
santa:-yaar mera kutta kho gaya hai. Main kya karu?
Banta:abe tu paper me kyo nahi de deta ki tera kutta kho gaya.
Santa: chup kar sale mera kutta pada likha nahi hai.

wife:mujhe kahi mehangi jagah le kar chalo
husband:chalo petrol pump chalte hai

Baniye ki biwi beemar thi:

Light na hone ki wajah se baniye ne candle jaladi aur bola
Doctor ko bulane ja raha hu,agar tumhein aisa lage ki tum nahin
bachogi to pleasw yeh candle bujha dena.

SNTA:Meri biwi buht fuzul khrch h
Jubse shadi hui he roz100, 200 mangti h
BNTA-Wo in peso ka kia krti h?
SANTA:Kya pata Mane kbhi dye he nhi
banta..... duniya ka sabse khatarnak jaadu kaha hota hai.....?

santa... beauty parlour main
jyotish-35 ki umar tak tumhare paas paisa nahi hoga aur tum dukhi rahoge
Santa-Uske baad?
Jyotish-Phir tumhe aise jeene ki aadat pad jayegi.

मगन – तेरी बीवी कल क्यों जोर– जोर से चिल्ला रही थी।
आवाज मेरे घर तक आ रही थी।
छगन – अरे यार कोई ऐसी बात नहीं थी, उसकी फोटो फेसबुक पे अपलोड करने की जगह OLX पर अपलोड हो गई।
और हद तो तब हो गई जब एक लड़के ने यह कहा, ऐ भाई ये 1960 का कबाड़ किसने डाला हैं।
बनिए की बेटी बनठन के बाहर जाती है,

बनिया- लगता है हमारी बेटी

का किसी लड़के के साथ प्यार का चक्कर चल रहा है,

बीवी- कैसे पता ,

बनिया- आज कल Pocket Money नहीं माँगती है,

बीवी – हे भगवान,

इसका मतलब लड़का बनिया भी नहीं है 🙂 🙂
Fair N lovely cream sach me kaam karti hai me tab maan jaugaa
jab wo black money wale ko fair bana de
RBI vaale nae note par itana aur likh
Dete ki 'kashmir Bhaarat ka hai' to
Padosi Desh kabhi nakali note hi nahi chhaapata.
par hamase koi poochhata kahaan hai!
I like three things
.
1. Pizza
2. Pepsi
3. 'You'
.
Pizza to eat,
Pepsi to drink,
and 'you' to .....
..
..
..
Oh Hello!
.
Table kaun saaf karega.
Don't give importance to money
b'coz
it can give bed but not sleep,
books but not brains,
clothes but not beauty,
luxuries but not happines.
So, Transfer it to my account!
Latest New IPHONE lekar showroom se nikli high heel wearing modern girl sidhi par ludhak gayi
trak ki awaz hue......
Dil thamkar bechari boli- 'O God..! mere haddi he ho'
Sardarni : Lo bijli chali gayi.
Sardar : bijli chali gayi hai to fan chala do.
Sardarni : Lo fir se kar di na sardaro wali baat. Agar fan chalaunga to mombatti bujh nahi jayegi!
Pathan ne restaurant phone kiya:
Hello!!
1 zinger burger!
1 fried rice!
1 frech fries!
Bhej do!
Restaurant: Ok, kis ke naam pe?
Pathan: Allah ke naam pe.

A kanjoos on his death time.
My wife, Where r u?
Wife: Yes, I'm here.
My sons & daughters r u all here?
Yes, Papa
Kanjoos: To phir bagal wale kamre ka pankha kyun chal raha hai.

दाल का भाव सुनकर एक आदमी मर गया.
Doctor ने death certificate मे cause of death लिखा-'High pulse rate'.😂😂
रेस्टोरेंट एसोसिएशन ने ऐलान किया है कि दाल-तड़का आर्डर करने पर पैन-कार्ड दिखाना अनिवार्य होगा
FATHER:
A banker
Provided by
Nature
MISER:
A person
Who lives poor
So that
He can die RICH!
इस दीपावली की स्पेशल मिठाइयां
तुअर कतली
तुअर रोल
तुअर शेक
तुअर बादाम मीठाई

हर हर तुअर । घर घर तुअर ।।😃😜😃😜
Bhul jao Kaju Katli....
Sirf khao dal patli...
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